05 February 2005

"Adventures with aviaries" will continue, but first..."A Canadian Summer Forecast" Update...

Today's Quote:
"Tigger is all right really," said Piglet lazily.
"Of course he is," said Christopher Robin.
"Everybody is really," said Pooh. "That's what I think," said Pooh.
"But I don't suppose I'm right," he said.
"Of course you are," said Christopher Robin."
'The Tao of Pooh' by Benjamin Hoff,
This just in...

To bring you up-to-speed on the burning question of "Just what day does summer occur in Canada?", I have heard from a few sources who seem to be in possession of some credibility? Credibility in the sense that they have never lied to be previously. Of course, I have never corresponded with them before, but that's not really important now, is it?

Kim E. , a self described "knadn_eh" , who is presently residing in the more temperate climes of the US, and fancies herself a "cross-border Ambassador", reports that summer actually comes-a-callin' in Oh Canada! "somewhere around" 22 July which, coincidentally or not, happens to be her mother's birthday. Oh wait, upon further inspection of Kim E.'s post, she is back-peddling just a bit and saying that summer actually hits, slams, gently brushes up against, one could say tickles, the great country of Canada "around" June. Kim, always leaving herself an "out", quickly qualifies this with, "It's been known to snow 2 hours north of Toronto on May 24th weekend" which, according to Kim, is THE BIG weekend in Canada. Probably due to preparations and pre-party meetings for her Mum's birthday which is somewhere "around" July 22nd, is what I'm thinking.

Now, in terms of "Just how long does it last?" and who among us doesn't want to know the answer to that burning question - oh wait, it's Canada we're speaking of just now, Kim informs me that Summer takes up residence until "about" , the 3rd week of August which again, coincidentally (or not?) is the first day of the Ex - or the Royal Canadian Exhibition. I don't know much about Canadian history, but apparently they become exhibitionistic somewhere 'round the 3rd week of August...I'm not sure what the"ex" means that Kim so surreptitiously inserted there...a hint I'm thinking...some kind of clue, but that's HER story and apparently she's sticking to it because she hasn't removed or amended her post from my GUEST BOOK. If that doesn't scream "you can take it to the bank", then I don't know what does.

Canadians are a very reliable and far advanced bunch. I still shake my head in sheer wonder as I contemplate the multi-tasker that is Julianna Banana, and how at such a tender age she is able to maintain and update her website, do a lot of chores both inside and out of the house , fight a rather formidable disease, mingle with all manner of celebrities and still find the time, on those rare moments off, to be a kid. Am I to believe she's an average Canadian? I really must visit this country.

Kim E., was also generous enough to offer information as to the best places to visit "(besides Winnipeg, of course!). Apparently Ms. E has some connections, or maybe gets kickbacks or "referral fees", for providing an "in" with some folk on the Georgian Bay which she goes on to explain to those not in the know, such as yours truly, that this Georgian Bay she speaks of is "way-North for those at the border!)".

Kim, just so you know, I am writing this from south, south, south of the border, but not down Mexico way...though I did at one time in my life reside in four different cities in Texas (not at the same time, of course). I haven't really thought of North Carolina as the "deep south" on second thought - it's all relative, isn't it? To those folk on the Georgian Bay who send you checks for luring unsuspecting blond American citizens (Canada must have heard a few dumb blond jokes, eh?), check out this handy map for a quick American lesson in geography, and the distance I'm going to have to close to visit those folk you speak of; North Carolina - Georgian Bay.

That's a LOT of real estate. Though I actually live in Wilmington, NC,
it was just easier to mark the distance from Raleigh to Ontario. Raleigh, as we all know, is a pretty famous place because it's the big city where Deputy Barney Fife (AKA Don Knotts), used to visit when taking some time off from the rigors and madness of keeping things in Mayberry in order. Barney would always stay in the same deluxe accommodation: corner room at the YMCA. You can't say the man didn't have class.

But back to my topic which was "WDDSOIC" or, if you're just joining us, What Day Does Summer Occur in Canada? To further elaborate on this inquiry, just this morning I received a note from, let's call s/he "anonymous which works out perfectly since that's exactly how s/he signed his/her comment submission. According to "anonymous", "generally it's Tuesday, often a Tuesday in July. However, it does tend to move around a little so you might wish to pack up your wool leggings, heavy parka, moon boots, mittens and cap and visit for a week in July hoping, just hoping beyond hope, to hit the day. Does this help?"

As a matter of fact, Ms./Mr. Anonymous, if that's your real name, it does help. It helped me come to the realization that I may never be able to visit the glory that is Oh Canada!, because I don't possess any of those articles of clothing that you mentioned and with the way my budget currently doesn't exist because there's not enough money to actually merit a budget, I will be quite retired and decrepit by the time I may...and I stress "MAY", have enough funds to buy the apparel required to visit any location North of Cleveland. This has been difficult for me to accept and, just to make sure, I again logged onto my bank statement and was met with an error code that said "blank statement". I didn't take this as a good sign. Clearly, I need to get the book I am currently writing published because there may be the off chance that I could possibly visit Oh Canada! on a book tour. Does anyone know how to contact Oprah? Feel free to write on my behalf.

So what does all this really mean? I have no idea, but I did find this site interesting and helpful! Apparently the Canadian summer is a fragile, mercurial and sometimes elusive animal. I do want to visit the great North someday, so perhaps that is what is behind my quest for discovering the days of summer, but now this whole wardrobe thing has me a bit disturbed (more so than my usual state of routine disturbance). I suppose I could start a "Send me to Canada Fund", but again, I'd like to get there while I'm still ambulatory and unaided by a walker. Plus, with folks like the lovely Julianna Banana, Kim E. and this mysterious "anonymous" comment poster, I'm all the more curious.

Back to work for me. I have a book to work on, an aviary update to write, and I'm about to be a grandmother at the tender age of 44, well, I guess by the time I'm a grandmother I will be 45 because Sunday, February 6th, I will be hitting the big 45. I remember not so long ago when I thought that anyone past the age of 40 was ancient. I stopped feeling that way a few days prior to turning 40. I'm slowly beginning to think that 50 is early middle age. I always laugh and feel the urge to punch people who say, "You're turning 45? Of course that's not old! Don't you know that age is just a number?". The people who always say that are usually a good ten to fifteen years younger than me and apparently see the fear in my eyes and the wrinkles that are no doubt forming around them. Oh bother...as Winnie-the-Pooh would say who, I do believe, is Canadian himself?


Anonymous said...

I didn't anticipate commenting again so soon, but in cleaning all the shortcuts on my desktop I ended up on your page again and just couldn't let you go without offering some alternatives. You see, I've figured it out. If you can come up with $220 you can fly round-trip to Minneapolis which is only 450 miles from Winnipeg. I, Ms. Anonymous, can then pick you up and we can drive the rest of the way. Since I have parkas and hats and mittens and all that stuff in assorted and various sizes, you won't have to spend a bit on them. The only difficulty is that you get only 1 Tuesday with that airfare. To entice you even further, the route to Winnipeg takes us through FARGO! If you haven't seen the movie, you'll want to before visiting. We'll pass near Tansem (which is almost like Tamsen except it isn't), Oslo and Big Woods. We can stop in Grand Forks and East Grand Forks where the Red River flooded the downtown area (plus a lot else) and then hindered fire fighters when the downtown went afire amid all the water. Then we'll follow the river all the way to Winnipeg.

Anonymous said...

Oops, I wasn't done. On the return trip we can visit East Braintree, pass by the northern most tip of the United States, eat lunch in Warroad which for a tiny town has an incredible hockey team most years. Then south some more to places like Shooks and Funkley and Blackduck and Tenstrike on our way to Bemidji where we can see a huge statue of Paul Bunyon and his big blue ox. We could visit the headwaters of the Mississippi River. And, except for air fare and food, no cost because I also have a tent and sleeping bags! What think you, eh? Of course I'd have to figure out how to let you know who I am but if I can figure out all this other stuff, I should be able to figure that out too without having to create my own blog site. Anxiously awaiting a reply -- Ms. Anonymous